If you're in a similar position as me sometimes you have to take a step back, realize what you can't control and focus on what you can.
The legal proceedings, in respect of my finances, have forced me to make hard decisions about where I do or don't spend my money. This has changed my mindset.
When I separated I left with a bag of clothes, a pillow and my laptop. My ex refused me taking anything from the house such as a spare bed or spare couches. I was fortunate that I could stay with a good friend for a few months, he had a bed and a blanket to lend me.
It felt like a riches to rags story at the time. Ok, not so much because I had a good income, but I was still paying the mortgage and bills on the family home and still providing money to my ex for food etc. and I was able to afford food. I know a great many people are in far worse situations so I am well aware I'm fortunate to have never been on the street, and I'm very grateful for everything I have in my life.
I recall though lying in his spare room, with clutter around me, my small bag on the floor and a crappy blanket over me and thinking how far I'd fallen.
The future for me was plagued with uncertainty. I'd gone from living in a large six bedroom home to bunking in a mates spare room with a borrowed blanket and a bag full of clothes. It was a big change, for me.
Life was a mess but I was sure I was on the right path. I was absolutely sure I'd made the right choice.
Months later, when I got my own place, I had no furniture. I bought a bed, bunks for my girls and a cot for my son. I bought essentials for the kitchen and bathroom and that was it. I had no luxuries at the time. No TV.
Wow, was that the biggest eye opener for me!
Do not underestimate how amazing it is to have no TV! If you want to test a theory of how much of your life you waste on the TV, cut the plug off.
Seriously, do it!
When I had no TV I started out feeling bored. Then I would read, I'd exercise, I'd touch base with friends, in person, none of this chatting over Facebook stuff. I felt like I had a massive amount of extra time on my hands and started to utilize it. Before I knew it life started to feel more enriched.
