Preventing Children From Spoiling
No parent wants to raise their child to become a spoiled brat who believes the world owes them something. But if you buy your child everything without her having to work for it, that's exactly what she'll become. She'll have no appreciation of how hard it is to make money. As a result, there's a good chance she won't work her ass off in school. And when she's flunking out of school and can't find a job to support herself, she'll be knocking on your door for financial support in no time.
There are so many people I know who went to expensive private schools and don't give a damn about creating their own wealth because their parents are just going to hook them up with everything anyway. It's hard to appreciate money when you don't have to work hard for it. It's easy to say you are slumming it with a roommate and spending frugally when you've got a huge parental safety net below.
If you do everything and buy everything for your child, it's going to be so difficult for the average child to get motivated enough to maximize their potential. There is no way I'm telling my children they will be financially OK if they do nothing. They must do some struggling on their own.
Helping A Partner
Let's say you are relatively well off, but your partner is not. You know you can take care of the both of you without her ever having to work again. Should you? Probably not because then your partner might not try as hard in her career. She might not take as many risks because she's already so comfortable. She might also start taking you and your money for granted as people tend to do after a while.
It goes back to allowing people to reach their potential as much as possible on their own. People won't respect themselves if they know they didn't get to where they are due to their own merit. It's the same thing with people not respecting others who inherited their wealth instead of creating their own wealth. There's a careful balance between helping them succeed and buying their success.
Confident, successful, and independent people are much more attractive partners wouldn't you agree? There's less insecurity by them, less resentment by you when the passion fades, and much more compatibility.
There are those of you who are objecting because marriage is all about being a team. I agree. However, it's best if both spouses are financially independent because marriages are no guarantee. I have a friend who recently got a divorce after 13 years. Her spouse was wealthy, and because she felt comfortable in the relationship and had to take care of their child, she did not keep her skills up to date. She's now having a very difficult time finding a job after being out of the workforce for 13 years. The alimony will eventually run out, and I wish her the best of luck.
If her husband had encouraged her to be more financially independent during their marriage and if she never got comfortable living a wealthy lifestyle, I'm sure she would have maintained her skills and found it easier to find work after the divorce. The divorce settlement wasn't great for my friend because she was the one who wanted to break up.
Thriving At Work
Work is an interesting animal because you need to perform to get paid and promoted. However, there can be situations where doing nothing and saying nothing can drastically help your cause. You just need to demonstrate patience. One person I know was able to get promoted because he didn't say anything about a horrific new hire his CEO made. The new hire looked the part and had the right pedigree, but when it came down to actually doing the work, the new hire was clueless.
Instead of speaking up about the bad hire, the person simply stayed silent, did his work, and let the new hire drown in his incompetence. After 11 months, the CEO finally realized his mistake and let the new hire go. Apologetic that he passed over my friend for the role, the CEO made it up to him by giving him a 40% raise, two extra weeks of vacation, and the new title he should have gotten 11 months ago.
Bad apples always slip through the cracks. The main reason is because not enough people from different levels interviewed the person. People who are looking for jobs are like actors during an audition. It's very hard to trick 25 people vs. one or two. Always make sure as many people interview a person as possible. Once you've hired someone, it's extremely difficult to let the person go without at least six months to a year of documentation.
